Roots of Resilience
Introduction
We all face change and uncertainty, inevitably navigating challenges and loss at some point in our lives. Our levels of resilience can profoundly affect our capacity to cope with adversity, and whether we are able to restore a sense of ease and balance.
Our experiences, memories, and relationships continually shape how we understand ourselves and the world around us, which has an impact on our personal narratives and stories. This, in turn, can influence our resilience and how we respond to challenging circumstances.
Through deepening our self-compassion, awareness of ourselves, and connections with others, we can feel more supported in creating a sense of belonging - one of the integral cornerstones of resilience.
Understanding Resilience
Resilience is the capacity to adapt and respond to challenging situations, while holding ambiguity and uncertainty. It is a dynamic, ongoing process that may fluctuate depending on our life experiences, relationships, environment, and cultural contexts.
This is something we are able to cultivate and strengthen throughout our lives, while finding ways to learn and grow when we are navigating change. Even though it can be developed, our resilience is affected by many factors, such as genetic predispositions, personality traits, early caregivers relationships, and the life stressors we are exposed to.
Moreover, a personalised approach is essential in understanding how these factors uniquely impact our resilience. Research shows that when we are resilient, we are able to cultivate a more optimistic outlook - such as noticing moments of gratitude or joy - even in the midst of difficulties. With a resilient mindset, when we experience emotions such as anger, sadness, or fear, these are generally temporary, instead of persistent.
We are also more likely to approach challenges with a sense of curiosity, rather than withdrawing from them in avoidance. This curiosity can facilitate creative problem solving and learning, which reinforces our resilience.
Narrative and Resilience
Our personal narratives and stories play a significant role in shaping resilience. The way we make sense of our experiences, and the stories we tell about our lives, can influence our ability to cope with adversity and navigate challenging experiences.
When we take time to reflect and pay mindful attention to our stories, we can deepen our understanding of ourselves and our place in the world. This involves noticing our thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations as they arise, with acceptance and non-judgment.
By becoming more aware of our narratives and their impact on our lives, we can reframe our stories with insight and compassion, acknowledging the complexities of our experiences. Our personal stories can then become more intrinsically nuanced, enabling us to meet challenges with a greater sense of creativity and adaptability.
Furthermore, research in neuroscience also shows that paying mindful attention to our stories and narratives can lead to the growth of new neural pathways, improving emotional regulation, memory, and learning. This supports us in cultivating resilience when we are facing adversity and change.
Tips for Cultivating Resilience
Resilience is a complex, ever-evolving process influenced by multiple factors across our lives. This is something we can cultivate with intention and practice, so we are supported in adapting to our changing circumstances.
The following tips offer some suggestions for areas to consider:
Nurture meaningful relationships: It takes effort to cultivate and sustain relationships that are supportive and fulfilling. Consider the close relationships that bring you a sense of ease and belonging, and how you can foster deeper connections through regular communication, emotional connection, and shared activities - such as meeting for a walk or coffee. This can create a foundation of stability and safety that allows us to meet our circumstances with more resilience and buoyancy.
Create community: This may be something simple such as taking time to speak with a neighbour, joining events in your area, or going to your local park and coffee shop. By building these community networks and interacting regularly with people in your daily life, you can cultivate a deeper sense of security, grounding, and safety. As social beings, we are intrinsically wired for connection and have a fundamental need for belonging.
Keep moving: There are a myriad of ways in which we can move with enjoyment, depending on our individual needs and physical capacities. Find forms of movement that feel enlivening or relaxing, such as walking in nature, stretching or dancing. Listen to what your body is needing, and aim for daily consistency. This has been shown to reduce stress and anxiety, improve mood, and increase our energy levels, which supports our capacity to cope with challenges.
Extend gratitude towards your body: Take time to appreciate your physical body, as it is in the present moment. We are sometimes caught in patterns of fear-based reactions to discomfort and limitations, or focusing on areas of improvement. Consider brief pauses throughout your day to take a few deep breaths and focus on appreciation for your body’s functions, while also acknowledging the ways in which nutritious food and restorative rest support your well-being. Through expressing warmth and gratitude towards ourselves, we can cultivate a sense of relaxation and self-acceptance that fosters deepening resilience.
Offer yourself encouragement: Speaking with kind and affirming words can bring a sense of encouragement and upliftment for your accomplishments. By saying “well done” when you achieve something - even small daily tasks such as preparing a meal, tidying your home, or exercising - this can shift our default ways of critical thinking. Building new habits supports a growth mindset that can help us develop more confidence in our capacities when we are faced with challenges or setbacks.
Reflect on your stories with mindful attention: Through reflecting on our life's experiences with curiosity, we can gain a deeper understanding of ourselves, and how we have overcome previous challenges. Mindful attention is the practice of paying attention to our thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations in the present moment, without judgment or criticism. Consider writing down a challenging experience and approach it with kindness and self-compassion. This can support us in deepening self-awareness, and reshaping our personal narrative for greater resilience.
Connect with joy-filled activities: It requires energy and focus to meet our daily tasks and commitments. By deliberately carving out time for creative activities, such as drawing, music, or ceramics, we are expanding our capacity for relaxation and joy. This can offer a buffer to stressful conditions and support our overall well-being. By incorporating novelty and diversity with new activities, we can also remain flexible and adaptable, which can be helpful for cultivating a resilient approach.
Relax into being: We can often live in a goal-orientated state, where we are applying ourselves by doing. To cultivate resilience, it is also necessary to give ourselves the space to practice being. This involves relaxing into the present moment, letting go of an agenda or the need to achieve anything. Through taking time to simply unwind, amble in nature, or gaze at the horizon - however brings us a sense of ease - we are nurturing this state of being, and strengthening our resilience.
Consider the impact of trauma on your resilience: If you have experienced traumatic events and chronic stress, this can profoundly affect levels of resilience. Acknowledging the impact of these events, as well as the role of early life experiences, is vital in seeking support and exploring ways to cultivate resilience with patience and care. It often requires a thoughtful approach, and engaging with trauma-informed activities like yoga, deep breathing, and talk therapy can help you regulate your emotions and nervous system, and build resilience over time.
Conclusion
Resilience is a quality and skill that is influenced by a multitude of factors throughout our lives. These all interweave in unique and complex ways, and affect how we respond and adapt to challenges. By tending to the roots of resilience, such as creating meaningful relationships, cultivating self-compassion and deepening our understanding of ourselves, we can support this dynamic process and our overall well-being.